Abnormally Hazardous Activities

Ahh...the Fourth of July. I always intend to go watch the fireworks on the Esplanade, but then it's always so hot and gross out that I don't want to. I sent my boyfriend off on a boat to drink all day so I could study in peace. Or so I thought. The little neighbor children spent the day lighting firecrackers and throwing them, at the last possible moment, into their neighbor's clean laundry left out on the line. They are like 4, 5, and 8. I had my noise cancelling headphones on, rocking out to a steady soundtrack of white noise, to block out their parents' Loud Latin Dance Party BBQ, so I can't be sure I didn't just miss it, but I will assume from the lack of telltale wailing that no one lost an eye and/or finger. I pulled the shades up to watch, just in case, since clearly they were otherwise without adult supervision. Oh god though, what could ever possess you to hold a lit explosive in your hand for any amount of time? Or to allow your child to?? Didn't these people ever take Torts??? And failing that, didn't they take a warning from the three fingered guy who sold them their big sack of death just over the New Hampshire border, in the big yellow warehouse, 3 miles, on the left - buy one get one free!!!