Sounding Like A Moron 101
I almost quit my temp job yesterday. They made me do my least favorite thing in the world, which is to say they gave me a list of people to call, some vague instructions about what to ask them, and then disappeared back down to hell in a cloud of sulfurous smoke. I don't like talking to strangers, I don't like talking to strangers on the phone, and I particularly don't like being set up to sound like a total f*ing moron no matter what I say to a stranger on the phone. It went something like this:
2:45pm - Call 1
Me: I need to find out which monitors work with an XTA1000.
Them: That's the reverse way. We can't look it up that way.
Me: Are you sure?
Them: Yes. /click/
3:10 pm - Call 2
Me: Hi, I need to know what kind of mouse works with an RGA400?
Them: Do you want a 198p3ehr a 1p34u;ajf or a p3984hf?
Me: Um, what?
Them: /angrily/ What kind of moron are you! Stop wasting my time! Call back when you get a clue! /click/
3:30pm - Call 3
Them: Hello? How may I direct your call?
Me: /panicking/ Direct my call? Umm.... I wasn't told that my call would need to be directed! /hyperventilating/ /click/
And I didn't finish yesterday because I spent the last hour of the day hiding in the bathroom trying not to cry, so I have to do it again this morning.
Exacerbating the whole thing was the fact that I asked my agency to find out how long the assignment is supposed to last, and they said it was "open ended" because they "think" they "might" be looking for someone to hire full time. Considering that I can't pay my bills with what they're paying me, I would like a more definite time frame than that. Like, say, that it ends tomorrow. Or actually, I'd like it to end next Thursday at 4, which is when I have to get on a train to go away for the weekend.
Any good ideas for how to get out of a temp job without pissing off the agency so they never find me work again? I was thinking, I'm having that dental surgery thing at the beginning of October. I could stretch the truth a little and say I'm having "surgery" that I don't want to discuss and that I need a week off to recover so they should probably just go ahead and replace me at the end of September (or, like, tomorrow.) Then I could get something through another agency for a couple of weeks while I "recover" (from this awful job) and then go back to this agency with my new nose/boobs/heart. What do you think, Internet? You are my new Magic 8 Ball, so I'll do whatever you say.
2:45pm - Call 1
Me: I need to find out which monitors work with an XTA1000.
Them: That's the reverse way. We can't look it up that way.
Me: Are you sure?
Them: Yes. /click/
3:10 pm - Call 2
Me: Hi, I need to know what kind of mouse works with an RGA400?
Them: Do you want a 198p3ehr a 1p34u;ajf or a p3984hf?
Me: Um, what?
Them: /angrily/ What kind of moron are you! Stop wasting my time! Call back when you get a clue! /click/
3:30pm - Call 3
Them: Hello? How may I direct your call?
Me: /panicking/ Direct my call? Umm.... I wasn't told that my call would need to be directed! /hyperventilating/ /click/
And I didn't finish yesterday because I spent the last hour of the day hiding in the bathroom trying not to cry, so I have to do it again this morning.
Exacerbating the whole thing was the fact that I asked my agency to find out how long the assignment is supposed to last, and they said it was "open ended" because they "think" they "might" be looking for someone to hire full time. Considering that I can't pay my bills with what they're paying me, I would like a more definite time frame than that. Like, say, that it ends tomorrow. Or actually, I'd like it to end next Thursday at 4, which is when I have to get on a train to go away for the weekend.
Any good ideas for how to get out of a temp job without pissing off the agency so they never find me work again? I was thinking, I'm having that dental surgery thing at the beginning of October. I could stretch the truth a little and say I'm having "surgery" that I don't want to discuss and that I need a week off to recover so they should probably just go ahead and replace me at the end of September (or, like, tomorrow.) Then I could get something through another agency for a couple of weeks while I "recover" (from this awful job) and then go back to this agency with my new nose/boobs/heart. What do you think, Internet? You are my new Magic 8 Ball, so I'll do whatever you say.
posted by feithline @ 6:54 AM
3 Comments:
At 9:19 AM,
The Once and Future TC said…
I think that sounds like a good plan. Like you said, you don't want to tick off the agency at this stage, but how could they object to you leaving to have surgery? Especially when you're so graciously giving up this awesomely terrific job that might lead to a full-time position, and isn't that just every temp worker's dream?
By the way, I don't like talking on the phone in general, even to people I know (unless it's a quick cementing-of-plans kind of thing). Calling strangers to ask them vague questions would freak me out too. :(
At 8:44 PM,
Anonymous said…
dude, you are doing the temp agency a favor by working for them. seriously, you don't have to worry about quitting, especially if it's as horrible as you say. but anyways, all you have to do is make your supervisors/co-worker(s) sound really bad. if they did anything at all inappropriate, just exaggerate it. the agency will then feel sorry for you and find you another job instantly.
~ UDF
At 10:24 PM,
Anonymous said…
I feel your pain, as I was a telemarketer for a while. For a credit card company. Humiliating.
I agree with your idea. There are several ways to get out of things. Your own surgery. Surger of a loved one. Really, most of my excuses involve someone having surgery...
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